What's Brewing, Olga Piehler?
Since I started this blog I’ve had coffee or drinks with a variety of people—several are readers who reached out, a few high school pals, a couple professional acquaintances who’ve migrated to friends—and every one of those meetings have been beyond beneficial, not to mention fun. I’ve learned about my companions and I’ve started to see myself through others’ eyes. That can be touching, exciting and downright scary.
I met Olga Piehler at Toast & Berry in Montgomery yesterday morning. My path first crossed with Olga, AKA @mywyio, on Twitter a couple weeks ago. She is a brand new user, who is still figuring out the platform, but her insights on some HR topics propelled me to respond and follow her.
In the course of our interactions, one of us realized we were both in the Cincinnati area. Before I knew it we had a coffee date scheduled. I sensed when we exchanged phone numbers and started texting that we were going to be fast friends, but I couldn’t have anticipated how much so.
While I’ve made a habit of meeting professional acquaintances (candidates, hiring managers, vendors) for coffee for years, this is not a regular item on my new friend’s agenda. She joked that it felt like a blind date—I suppose that’s an accurate description.
As soon as I pulled into the parking lot, I received a text message that said, “Here! I’m wearing a black dress with polka dot! (No red rose!).” This text had me smiling as I walked into the restaurant. Before I knew it, we were seated, ordering avocado toast and getting to know each other.
The gist of our conversation is similar to one I’ve had over and over the last few months. We’re in our 40’s, have achieved success in our careers, are blessed to have beautiful children and a loving spouse, but we’re wondering if there is more to life. One difference about this conversation, as opposed to others I’ve had recently, is Olga’s interest in HR as a career has developed along the same timeline as my interest in continuing my HR career has waned.
As I told her about the less-than-ideal experiences that led me to be disenchanted with the profession, she reminded me of the positive affects a functioning HR team can have on an organization. I cautioned that HR influencers often live in the world of puppies, kittens and rainbows, forgetting that in the trenches is where the real issues are played out. I was sure to add a caveat that maybe there are dream companies out there with world-class HR departments and this was just not my personal experience.
At one point, Olga quietly asked me if she could give some feedback. As much as I’d love to be able to honestly say I’m wide open, I was trepidatious because feedback has been known to crush my spirit. I should mention I’ve also learned from constructive criticism too, but the initial feeling is generally that of a gut punch. She told me how I have a balanced perspective and real-world context surrounding the challenges facing modern workers (ok…that wasn’t so bad….I’m sure there’s a ‘but’ coming…) but that I often temper my opinions with “maybe I’m wrong” or “that’s just my experience” basically dismissing my point of view. Then she said, “You have a great perspective, own it.”
That certainly felt like a gut punch, but one I was happy to take. I hadn’t realized how much I discredited myself when discussing topics where I have a strong background and training. Even after years of experience and intellectually knowing I am qualified, imposter syndrome subconsciously strikes again. As this realization washed over me, I teared up and Olga grabbed my hand. In that moment, I realized a) I’ve made a new friend and b) this is something I need to spend some time, energy and focus on correcting. This casual meeting led me to a breakthrough in self development—that’s remarkable. If it was a fraction as meaningful for Olga, we had a heck of a morning,
As we finished up our coffee and prepared to part ways, Olga suggested I start a series where I regularly meet someone for coffee to discuss the challenges of midlife and then blog about the experience. Now that was feedback that I enjoyed hearing! Realizing the impact a meet-up can have for both parties, this seems like a no-brainer.
So, inspired by my new friend, I’m proud to announce my new series, What’s Brewing?
The goal is 3 new coffee or beer meetings per month. If you noticed I added beer into the mix, it’s because I believe even great ideas can be improved upon. Also, I’d love to commit to a weekly meetup, but sometimes life gets in the way and I want to leave wiggle room for emergencies. Pretty simple, but most great ideas are.
Here’s how What’s Brewing? will work:
I will commit an hour of my undivided attention to you and I expect the same in return.
You must be okay with publicly admitting you spent an hour with me because we’re going to take a selfie to document the occasion.
Topic may be decided beforehand or at the meeting or can flow naturally. Topics could include but are not limited to career, relationships, wellness/fitness, spirituality, parenting, fashion, bourbon or mid-century jello recipes. Really, it’s that open.
I’m open to meeting in Greater Cincinnati in or around the 275 loop. I’m also open to video calls, but you should be willing to enjoy a beverage as we chat. When I travel, I’ll put out the bat signal—Ft Lauderdale and Washington DC coming up soon.
If you’d like to get added to my calendar, shoot me an email at mollie@midlifepickle.com.
I’d love to learn how you’re dealing with the challenges of the midlife pickle. Please consider this your personal invitation to meet. If you’re not up for in-person Mollie time, I hope you’ll check back often to see who I meet and what kind of problems we solve, or more likely the mischief we find.
