Exploit Me, Baby
Three people I worked with at my last full-time job contacted me over the last 6 days to tell me they were moving on to new opportunities. THREE PEOPLE left an HR department of less than 20 team members in LESS THAN ONE WEEK. That’s clearly not a toxic work environment and I have lots of regrets leaving that situation. If you believe that, I have bridge I’d like to sell you…
I spend a lot of time, probably too much, contemplating the current work climate and the future of work. I guess it’s my years in HR and the fact that most of my social media contacts (Twitter and LinkedIn) work in those areas. Even though I’m no longer in a full-time HR/Recruiting role, I’m constantly reading updates and finding myself involved in discussions surrounding employer engagement, employee retention, organizational development, leadership training and change management to name a few topics.
The more distance I get from the corporate world, the more I realize I may have been expecting way too much from employer/employee relationships—maybe we all are. Could this be the fault of overzealous recruiters (I know nothing about overzealous recruiters…did I mention I also have some ocean front property in Arizona for sale?) trying to corner top talent? Or is it cheap ass executives striving to get the most bang for their buck by shoving culture and perks down our throats instead of ponying up cash. Or is it the fault of employees looking for an easy career path with absence of thought into goals and ambitions beyond showing up to an office 50 hours a week?
It took my midlife crisis to see how foolish I had been to believe the sack of lies that companies tell—lies I spent years selling. I actually bought into the “be a part of our family” or “we invest in our people” or “we value work-life balance” bullshit. Even worse, I internalized mission statements dripping with buzzwords (inspire, differentiate, innovate, disrupt, lead, etc) and readily sold it to unsuspecting candidates for far too long. I suppose I can take solace in the fact that I believed it at the time, but once I started seeing the truth, it became harder and harder to sleep at night.
Beyond my jaded attitude towards companies, my expectations were way out of line. I felt entitled to career advancement without putting in the work to figure out what was best for me personally. I anticipated a culture full of driven yet compassionate and helpful people who wanted to make the world a better place. I hoped for leaders who inspired and recognized my loyalty and hard work. I believed in the 40 years and a gold watch myth, which in hindsight would be a mind-numbing purgatory.
Time and time again, I’ve been disappointed by employers. This is like dating a married man who communicates that he has zero intention of leaving his wife, yet being surprised when he doesn’t leave his wife. I’m not alone in wanting more from my employer (career advancement, great benefits, schedule flexibility, above-market comp, recognition for accomplishments) but to believe the hype that all of that exists AND I’d love my job so much it wouldn’t feel like work was a childish pipe dream.
In all reality, I should take some responsibility for my naiveté. I don’t make a habit of taking any other advertising at face value, so why did I believe the employer branding propaganda I was spoon fed and subsequently force fed to others? I suppose I bought into the “love what you do and you’ll never work a day in your life” hype I was sold for the first 22 years of my life. I’ve constantly searched for that perfect job instead of realizing work is part of life. Growing up on a farm shoveling manure and hoeing rows of veggies should have taught me that work can suck but is still worthwhile. Yet I bought the lie that there is some sort of shortcut or life hack that would make work a breeze.
Ultimately, I lost sight of the transactional nature of work. I actually believed my employer cared about me beyond what I could provide for them. In good faith, I gave my all. I dedicated myself to the companies I worked for and expected more in return than they were willing to give, even if they said otherwise.
After the last few months working as an independent contractor, my relationship with work is much healthier. When I contract with a client, we’re very clear about expectations from both sides. It’s approached as two adults coming to terms with a mutually beneficial goal instead of the parent-child overtones of the employer-employee relationship. I’m not expecting a long-term commitment and they’re not over-stating their intentions. I give it my all and work to the best of my ability, but recognizing that when the project is finished, I’ll collect my check and move on.
This is a more honest approach to the transaction of work and it’s been WAY healthier for my psyche. In prior roles I always felt a bit exploited because the expectations I had about what I would get from the relationship never lived up to reality. Where full-time employers attempt to create the illusion of a relationship, the gig economy has more of a quid pro quo attitude that avoids the superficial pretending to care about employees beyond their output.
If I ever return to a full-time role, I will approach it like a long-term contract gig. The illusion of permanent employment is a joke. Everyone should approach their work as a consultant, freelance or contract worker. This means continually updating and improving your skillset, expecting the engagement to end at any moment and knowing you have intrinsic value that is not associated with your job.
Sure, I’ve worked with some great people over the years at several decent companies (and one dumpster fire of an organization that ironically was not my tenure in the waste and recycling industry). I don’t regret my time in those roles as they taught me what I require out of a work relationship.
I’ve also developed opinions about talent acquisition, onboarding, engagement, retention, talent development and leadership philosophies. After years of seeing companies struggle with these same topics I’m starting to think all of it is just distraction to cover up the transactional nature of work. Maybe we’d all feel less bothered by being exploited if both sides of the relationship were just honest about the exploitation. I’m certainly feeling more respected and less dirty entering work situations with my eyes wide open. Exploit me, baby, just do it with my consent.
