All tagged Kids

No Bullshit Parenting

I just spent an hour calming the nerves of my 11-year-old. He’s been brave for the first 10 days of this social distancing situation, but today was his breaking point. I thought today may be mine, but I had to hold it together to help my little guy out. I can pencil in my own ugly cry tomorrow between 10:30 and 11:00pm.

Boredom

I don’t understand boredom, never have.

Well, there was this one time in about 1984 when I uttered the word bored. Quicker than I knew what happened I was in the barn, ankle-deep in cow shit spending a hot summer afternoon contemplating all the fun things I could have been doing had I just taken a few minutes to find some fun instead of whining.

Babies are Assholes

The hectic lifestyle, exorbitant expenses and unrealistic expectations make being a modern parent exhausting. I won’t even mention how babies are huge assholes—oh wait, maybe I just did. But come on, they’re demanding tyrants with deplorable communication skills.